I wrote a biography of my life tonight. Haha. I'm redoing my other site and that's why I made it. I am currently debating if I should put it up here. Well here it goes anyways.
This would be the biography about the incredibly interesting Kimberly. Okay I know you can't understand sarcasticNESS over the internet so I'll just point it straight out, I was being sarcastic. If you are reading this to learn the meaning of life, become a better person, or just reading this not to be bored... I'm sorry you will probably be completly let down. BUT if infact you really want to learn more about me (which is probably the lie of the century) you can keep reading.
Hi there. Okay here goes the basics. I'm 16, junior in a crappy 'competitive' highschool with asians. Sorry if you are asian and offended by this. Actually I'm not sorry. I am also a level 9 gymnast (just to get this out of the way now... no I am NOT going to the Olympics and if you even began to think the word 'why' I will have to sock you.) Been in gymnastics way to long but still do it for who knows why. I'm actually currently not doing gymnastics but that's another story for a bit later. Wow. Now you have something to look forward to.
 Yup. Here's a picture of me. I just so damn sexy (insert the sarcastic voice here). It's me all dressed up from homecoming 2003. I like this picture. And I know why. Cause I look fake. Fake nails, fake hair, fake smile. Well I lied. My nails aren't fake, the smile could be real if my dad hadn't died the week before homecoming, and my hair SHOULD have been fake because it was a huge disaster. Yah those are more stories for later.
God I got to get a list going here.
Okay. Back to the story of my life. I was born in a little town in Southern California. And no my life is nothing like the people from "The OC"... sorry to disapoint once again. I'm outgoing yet shy. Quiet and loud. Happy yet sad. I guess my life is just a bunch of contradictions but hey it works for me.
School. Somedays are good, some are bad. Lot's of people suck, a few are worth keeping around. I guess I can start from the beginning. Which is not really the beginning but just the place I want to start. Deal with it. Fifth grade. I moved to a new school which was supposed to be 'better' than my last. I moved to a place where I only knew one person and sometimes they decided I just wasn't good enough. Sometimes I'm not. I could not find my place at this school. It was hard but then you realize life just keeps getting harder. Sixth grade. My friends were shit. I thought I finally found my place here. Nope. I guess we can move onto boy troubles now.
Sixth grade was my first boyfriend. It lasted a whole recess. Incredible, I know. Apparently he really liked me (which I was surprised to find out). When I finally talked to him again in 8th grade I guess he *cried* over me. Haha. It was just a fucking recess romance (literally). No reason to cry, dear boy. Then there was another guy. We went out for a weekend. I guess these guys always had a joke about this. "2" One of them was 2 minutes and the other was 2 days. It's quite amusing if you actually think about it.
Also, in sixth grade I was damaged for life. My 'friends' decided to play a trick on me. I decided to take what I wrote out. Let's just try to block it from our minds k? So many other things happened in sixth grade that I, still to this day, cannot trust people. I guess that's my problem.
Seventh grade. Yup still friends with the same crappy people. There was my one friend who was the only person who I could call a true friend. The rest were just fake and people you know you will never talk to again. Gymnastics was my outlet. Where I had true friends. I guess that still stands for today.
Eighth grade was nothing special. Became closer to my real friends and saw sides of people that confirmed my belief that they were evil. Yah, evil. I actually hated my 'place' in junior high. You had to be a specific way to fit in but yah, I could not do that. I was looking forward to highschool where I could "start over" and was determined not to screw it up.
Started highschool, absolutely loved it. It seemed so different than junior high. The people seemed more real and had more fun. Well after 3 years into it I look back at myself as a naive little girl. The people are just as fake as they were before, but yes they do have more fun. So I was a freshman. Yup, there was another boy in this part of my life. I don't want to say to much because I'm sure he will read this. (Hi!) But the thing lasted two weeks and I regret some parts of it and others I don't. Oh yah. I got a 4.0 both semesters!
Okay moving onto my gymnastics season of my freshman year. Wow. I kick major ass. I was a second year level 8 and was having so much fun with gymnastics. This was my favorite season yet and probably ever. Our team was awesome and we worked hard while having fun. It was looking like I could win State and even Regionals with the routines and consistency I had. I even got a 9.625 on beam! I was winning meets and just having a blast. I when you hit the top all you can do is go down.
State... I had strep throat and did not practice the entire week before the competition. I don't even remember how I did at that competition. Regionals... I was completly prepared and ready to win. Guess what. I get strep throat again. I had about 102 temperature but I had to compete. This was my one shot of doing something actually good. To make a long story short I tied for first on bars but got the silver medal. Wow that was crap. I know it's not about what score or place you get but the satisfaction of doing a great job but I didn't feel that satisfaction and still don't. Wow that was so fucked up. If you couldn't tell I'm still bitter about the fact.
Okay move to summer between 9th and 10th grade. Life just kept goin downhill. Instead of going to Hawaii I got my tonsils taken out. All of this so I could go level 9 the next season. Then, in July. I remember the day like it was yesterday. I was at my friends house playing on the computer with her when I received a phone call. It was my mom. Something had happened to my dad. At first they thought it was a heart attack or stroke. I don't even remember what was said or what I did. All I remember is crying.
Somehow I got to the hospital and I just remember confusion and Jerry Springer was on the television. Later in the week my dad was diagnosed with a brain tumor. They told us that it probably was not cancerous. They lied. He had several operations and came home a week or two later. We didn't know how much time he had left or what was going to happen.
Tenth grade was a complete blur. I did not tell very many people about my dad cause I did not want all that stupid fake shit that comes along with people finding out that your dad is dying. Gymnastics was decent. I competed level 9, made Nationals and my dad saw me compete at Nationals for his last time. I completely screwd up but he was proud of me anyway.
Eleventh Grade. One week before homecoming exactly my dad died of brain cancer. It was a hard time but it was a relief. We had said our goodbyes way before then and he was in so much pain. I just wanted him to feel better. Maybe it is horrible for me almost being happy that he was gone. I mean I loved my dad so much but there is only so much suffering you can take and pain for another person. He went to a better place. But all I knew was my life will never be the same.
I switched gyms and then proceeded to tear my meniscus. Surgery happened after that and 6 weeks of crutches. Holy shit was this a hard time. I was literally hysterical when I found out I needed surgery. It just seemed like it was one bomb after another. I kept asking my self what I did to deserve all this crap being thrown at me? I'm goin be cliche for the moment. Whatever doesn't kill (and trust me it almost did) only makes you stronger. From October to November were probably the hardest time of my life. But I got through it and am changed.
I'm still looking for that 'perfect guy.' Or actually I was. I'm done with that and have completely given up. They will come find me if it's meant to be. It's not worth my time and energy worrying over some guy who doesn't give a shit about you. If they like me for me than they can go right ahead and chase after me. I'm sick of chasing after them. I want a guy that I can just talk to but am not the only one ever thinking of things to say. It has got to be two-sided.
After all this I cannot truely say I'm a better person. I'm just different. I've narrowed down my friendships to people I actually want in my life. I had enough of the stupid bullshit that comes along with telling people exactly what they want to hear. I just avoid the entire situation to begin with.
Okay so now I'm going to say what I have learned. Don't trust people, they will only stab you in the back in the end. Okay that was harsh. I need to learn to trust those worthy of being trusted. Don't care what people think of you. It only matters of what you think of yourself. All things in life end. Even life itself. Take your time and don't rush through life or you will miss the most important stuff. Take advantage of what you have when you have it and don't regret what you have done in the past.
"Many of us crucify ourselves between two thieves - Regret of the past and fear of the future."
I'm not regretting and no longer have fears.
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